The Kangaroo Chronicles


At the turning of the ninth month my girlfriend and I decided to take a road trip to Augusta on the West Australian coast. I confess that my heart harked for a return to telephone banking as I yearned for the chance to talk to miserable people; but alas I am forced to travel through wild countries filled with wildlife and culture. My green eyes of jealousy burn ever brighter when I think of all those people who have the pleasurable sound of an alarm clock waking them up at 7am and here, I must wake up when I chose and do what I want. This is a painful existence.
As we entered into Augusta word had reached our ears of a spectacular location to watch the sunset. Darkness had already started to descend upon the land so we jumped into the car in what would be a race against time to catch the setting sun. We made our way into the forest and up the hill towards our destination; however it seemed like the lords of this realm did not want us to view this amazing sight for what happened next was mayhem. Out of the darkness, waiting for the perfect moment, leapt the largest Kangaroo I have ever seen. It was about 8ft tall and you could feel the vibration after it hit the ground right in front of our moving car. Fortunately Anna has the reactions of Batman and slammed the breaks on before we hit it, but after this the whole forest seemed to come alive with jumping Kangaroos. It was at this point that Anna's nerve almost broke.
'Michael its no use, there's 10,000 strong, its over. This is folly, we will never make it'. She screamed.
Sensing her fear I was forced to summon all my wisdom and courage to create the heroic words which would will my fair maiden to go on. I canít remember what I said exactly but I think it went something like this:

'Once more unto the breach, dear Anna, once more;
Or close the wall up with our English dead.
In peace there's nothing so becomes a man (or women),
As modest stillness and humility:
But when the blast of war blows in our ears,
Then imitate the action of the tiger;
Follow your spirit, and upon this charge
Cry 'God for Harry, England, and Saint George'

The change was swift, nerves were steadied and a new Anna was born. She took on the role of a rally car driver as each Kangaroo waited until the last moment before trying to cross the road. Heroically, I sat back in the passengerís seat, watching as we made it to the top of the hill alive and well after dodging these suicidal animals.
Once we arrived everything else was forgotten for the view was beyond the description of any words. I was entranced by the spectacle, so much so that I didn't even realise the legions of mosquitoes swarming around us.

M Bell

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